I worked in a bridal salon
IN MOST cases, “here’s the bride” are happy words – unless you’re a marriage consultant preparing to speak with an upset client.
When brides get frustrated with the dress-shopping process, it’s often the result of common mistakes made on their dates, an expert says.
Hayley Segar worked as a wedding consultant for seven years before going freelance as a designer.
Writing about her experience for Insider, she address with Insider.com the seven biggest mistakes brides make during or right after their wedding dress shopping.
BRINGING TOO MANY GUESTS
Between excited siblings, enthusiastic friends, and enthusiastic moms on both sides of the family, it can be easy to invite a handful or two of guests when you start shopping for clothes.
Some brides bring their entire bridal parties, making shopping an event similar to a shower or bachelorette party, but large crowds can make the decision difficult, Segar said.
“While some brides thrive on their group energy, others may struggle to distinguish their thoughts and opinions from the rest of their group,” she wrote.
“It can create a frustrating and overwhelming experience.”
Choosing a few close loved ones to accompany you will result in less stress, which usually means more fun too.
Even after saying “yes” to the dress, some brides continue to shop, in case another amazing dress or a great deal turns up around the corner.
“It’s not uncommon to think that there may be a more perfect set than the one you bought,” Segar explained.
This fear of missing out is only heightened by targeted ads, ambitious Pinterest posts, and every newly married friend’s Instagram post.
If you love the dress you bought but can’t stop shopping, remember everything you love your dress.
“Honor the choice you made,” Segar advised.
“There will always be gorgeous dresses, but only one is your wedding dress.”
SAY ‘YES’ TOO QUICKLY
Of course, some brides keep shopping because they’re worried they’ve committed to a dress too soon.
Buying a dress too quickly is another common bridal mistake, Segar said.
She detailed a common scenario that causes some brides stress: “You visited a store or two, said yes to a dress and signed the contract to buy a dress that you liked at the time.
“If you’ve made what appears to be minimal purchases, it’s fair to assume that you may have committed too soon,” Segar said.
If you really don’t like your dress, you can keep an eye out for something new. However, to learn to love your dress again, the same advice for over-shoppers applies.
“The fact that you loved your dress so much when you bought it is a feeling you should come back to when that thought comes to mind,” Segar said.
LOCK ON DETAILS
A round neck. Illusion sleeves. Corset back and asymmetrical hems.
These tiny features can make or break your dress, but if you get carried away with them, they can spoil the shopping experience.
“By zooming in on a certain feature of the dress – whether it’s a mesh V-neck, the color of the lace, or the presence or absence of sleeves – you fixate on it”, Segar said.
Fixing, she writes, can make you question the whole purchase.
If you find yourself staying up late staring at your phone’s camera roll, obsessed with a pearl train, ask your marriage consultant to step in.
“The best remedy is usually to call the store and ask to try the dress on again to determine if the scope of the ‘defective’ features has been inflated,” Segar explained.
“Wedding dresses aren’t something we buy every day,” she continued. Focusing too much on these little details is totally normal, but it’s also avoidable.
FOLLOW A RIGID CHECKLIST
If you’ve been sketching your dream dress since kindergarten, you can walk into a bridal salon holding a well-worn checklist of must-haves.
This rigidity, however, can make for a clunky and stunted happy experience, and set you up for major disappointment.
“It can be tempting to approach it by looking for a dress that fits a mental checklist instead of focusing on finding something to wear that will make them happy on their big day,” Segar said.
“If you know you feel like doing it, be sure to lean into the fun nature of this process and purchase.”
PANIC OVER THE BUDGET
No matter how tightly you stick to a budget, it’s normal to have “high emotions” about buying your wedding dress.
“For most people, a wedding dress is the biggest clothing purchase they’ve ever made,” Segar explained.
Even when you love your dress, sticker shock can reverberate after you leave the store and leave you in shock.
“The whole wedding planning process is filled with large filings, so it’s okay to sweat about it,” Segar reassured.
If you’re worried you’ve gone over budget, take a look at your spending plan and decide to cut back on the things that seem less important, or trade in for more financially beneficial options.
DRESS TO IMPRESS OTHERS
Weddings bring a lot of emotions to the surface, not only for the bride, but also for family and friends.
It also translates to high expectations — and brides can be frustrated by unsolicited or unsatisfactory opinions from well-meaning loved ones.
“The pressure to give in to these opinions can be heavy, especially when they come from such important people in your life,” Segar said.
It’s important to hold on and “wear what brings you joy,” she wrote, if only for your photos.
“The difference between seeing someone in something they felt obligated or obligated to get and seeing a bride wearing a dress that makes her really happy is incredibly palpable,” Segar said.
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