Why doesn’t he want to marry me?

An anxious woman.

Skilled columnist and advisor Fiona Caine answers another set of reader dilemmas.

MY PARTNER DOESN’T WANT TO MARRI US ANY MORE – SHOULD I FIND SOMEONE ELSE?

Three years ago I met a divorced man with two teenagers. We were very much in love, but her children refused to have anything to do with me. He wanted to marry me, but in the end he decided he would lose his children if he did, so we broke up.

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I started dating other people but there was never the spark that I had with him. Last November, we got back together. It didn’t take me long to realize that I was still so in love with him. In addition, his children have met me and we get on well. But he said he didn’t think he wanted to remarry. I’m shocked because he wanted to get married first. I’m confused and wonder if we have a future together.

FIONA SAYS DID YOU ASK HER WHY?

I wonder if you actually asked him why he changed his mind?

Many couples live together without getting married and he might not feel the need. Or it could still have something to do with his kids – he doesn’t want to risk upsetting them again or it’s financial.

Unless he tells you how he feels, you won’t know if you still want to be with him. So talk to him.

Echo of Bournemouth:

Echo of Bournemouth:

You could also spend some time thinking about why you want to get married.

People stay together because they love, trust, and respect each other, and you don’t need marriage to prove that to each other.

THE BREAK-IN LEFT ME SO ANXIOUS

Since our house was broken into a year ago, I can’t sleep. Every stream or creak; each time the freezer turns on; every twig hitting a window makes me wide awake and alert.

The break-in happened while we were sleeping, so now I have nightmares of waking up to find someone watching me. The police weren’t much help at the time and haven’t caught anyone yet.

My husband understood at first but now he thinks I’m paranoid. Maybe I am, but I don’t know how to get over it.

FIONA SAYS: PLEASE ASK FOR SUPPORT

Having your house robbed is deeply traumatic. It’s your home (and everyone feels they have a right to be safe in their own home), and a burglary can bring feelings of violation as well as deep insecurity – so you really aren’t alone. in this case. Feelings like this can take a long time to go away – but a year is a long time to still live with this level of anxiety and it looks like you could use some help. Contact victim assistance.

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